The next horror showed up only in a sport coat and slacks , first with a tie, but soon in a turtleneck or open-collared shirt. I recently dined at luxury steakhouse KO Prime next to a large table of businessmen in golf shirts and baseballs caps. Restaurants can't afford to turn away the business. In certain settings, overly casual dress can be like too much perfume; there are limits to how much you can consciously shut it out of your senses. From there, it was a few short steps to no jacket at all, just a golf shirt, then t-shirt, then neon mesh wife-beater. To the horror of many at the time, this gave way to the tail-less dinner jacket , white pleated shirt, and black bowtie. I also worry that our all-casual, all-the-time sensibility is related to a broader coarsening of our culture, the decline of civility toward strangers in public life, the bubble of self-entitlement that a growing number of people appear to live in. We go to church in sweatpants, answer court summonses in novelty t-shirts, wear pajamas to the supermarket, sport jeans at funerals.
The next horror showed up only in a sport coat and slacks , first with a tie, but soon in a turtleneck or open-collared shirt. You could get with the program, or take your business elsewhere. Good manners are designed to help minimize the inevitable friction that results in public life, and they used to imply more effort than simply asking your neighbors to ignore you. That strikes me as lazy and ungracious. A few things are going on: In certain settings, overly casual dress can be like too much perfume; there are limits to how much you can consciously shut it out of your senses. My professional restaurant reviewing duties are evenly split between fine dining and budget-priced restaurants, but even in the fancy joints, what excites me most is the food, not the ambiance. I think a roomful of dressed-up patrons feels very different from one in which some folks are dressed up and others down. But the true death-knell just sounded this month: More formal dress once symbolized the differentness of certain occasions from the humdrum social interactions of quotidian life. How did fine dining go from an occasion for your Sunday best to the equivalent of a Jersey Shore casting call? Restaurants can't afford to turn away the business. From there, it was a few short steps to no jacket at all, just a golf shirt, then t-shirt, then neon mesh wife-beater. Locke-Ober, the last restaurant in Boston to enforce a strict dress code, recently reopened after a brief hiatus, and its new owner has shot the jackets-required rule, though jeans and sneakers remain verboten. I also worry that our all-casual, all-the-time sensibility is related to a broader coarsening of our culture, the decline of civility toward strangers in public life, the bubble of self-entitlement that a growing number of people appear to live in. I get annoyed by people who show up at a Halloween party, black-tie wedding, or opening-night gala without applying enough effort to their attire to reflect the spirit of the occasion. High-end dining is changing. And they were dead-serious about it. Many customers argue vehemently against dress codes, too. Americans have progressed with informality in dress to the point where we appear to have lost our sense of occasion entirely. That couple over there is trying to celebrate their silver wedding anniversary, and you look like you just strolled off the 18th hole? I suspect the absence of a sense of decorum, an underdeveloped belief that some situations demand more formal behavior and dress than others, might be of a piece with our society's increasing rudeness and self-centeredness. I understand how we got to this point, and respect restaurateurs' decisions to relax their standards. Between the depressed economy, rising food costs, and new expenses like OpenTable and Groupon, many restaurants are struggling to stay profitable and win new customers. A jackets-suggested restaurant is also a sort of costume party, and folks that flout the dress code are detracting from the atmosphere. I spend most of my time in and generally prefer more casual places.
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